Tag Archives: love

Tea with the Moon

 A shiny blue kettle makes tea for one
Rain patters on the attic window
Looking out across a night of  lovers
The full moon stirs a sacred longing

Honour the mysteries of this life.
Everywhere, is a gateway
that will draw you in and bless you.

It pulls so much sweetness through this body
Such tender sadness
A white hot stream of grief
That carves out channels of fire
In places that nobody speaks of.

The scent of incense lingers on the air
And two candles flicker peacefully
Light and shadow dance on the walls
Of this great space waiting to be filled.

This morning my body was sick
So I lay down and slept
When I awoke
It was to a place of incredible disconnection
I sense life slipping out of reach
What realm is this
Where am I now?

Change has her own rhythm
We can not master time.

Life seems to say:
“This is what is happening now,
and anyway,
Who are you?
Will you accept or resist?”

Another world has fallen away
Just as a snake drops her skin
And in this new place
The silence is grey.
There is no ground
No body, no voice
Because the witness has no solidity
Everything is unfamiliar
There is no one left here for anything to refer to.
Whose eyes are these?

Something will continue.

I can not explain to anyone
That I do not know what is happening.
That I am so vast, I am lost inside my own self.
And so small I don’t even exist.
Sometimes I feel like everything I ever was
tries to hold on. But it is already gone.

Searching for reality, Everything melts away.

Nobody can silence
a voice seeking truth.
Even when thoroughly ashamed,
we stand up straight, saying:
“Here I am, wash all I am not away”

A young bird is so perfectly innocent
She does not stop singing
Until she finally finds her song.

Honesty continuously refines herself.
She can not be defined.
She can only keep moving
and keep letting go.

It does not matter how we feel.
If we use it well.
Take everything as a question, not an answer.
That’s where freedom lies.
We get shown the same thing thousands of different ways.
That is all there is,
everything points to That.

Chaos descends on all our days and nights
We hold on this tiny spark at the centre of it all.
“I am here” We say,
“Please, continue.”

Who understands how painful it can be
to stand here naked.
It can be so humiliating to reveal
that the best you have to offer
Is nothing more than an illusion.
Who has felt the value of tears?

Who has reached that place
that, out of choicelessness,
Summons up the courage it takes to say
“Look these are my mistakes
I don’t even know how ignorant I am
but teach me, please
strip me bare.”

Nobody can teach
a heart to love
Nobody can say what love is.
In each being it arises
in a unique way
And each expression is a path
That leads unto itself.

Those who tasted truth
Or glimpsed it
Even for a fleeting moment
Go crazy
They become wild and uncontainable
They attempt to break down the construction
Of everything which obscures it.

Tonight I am alive
Light touches everything.
It is only my own self.
We wound our own self
All seeking the same Love

So blind to it all.
I can’t even speak.
I don’t know where I came from
or what creates these worlds.
From where does one find the integrity
to surrender, so unknowing, to life?
How do we keep on stepping
so clumsily amidst all this beauty?
What pulls us?

My prayer is this:

May love find her way
With grace, and wisdom
May she have full presence
And full strength

May she destroy wisely
In a way which heals
May she create space
where others find truth

May she wear a face
that reveals the presence of others
May she reflect clearly
undistorted

May her humility
give birth to compassion
May her gentleness have genuine power
to allow others their strength

and honour the freedom to love.

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Stormy Seas

“The snake inside a bamboo cane…
can only go up or down.”

He was smiling at me

“Which way will you go?”

I know not of what you speak
but I will follow you into the Mystery
With the beating of my heart
By the light of our eyes
Through your touch
Show me the way up.
Lead me to G-d

Oh Friend, who leads who?
Here is my faith
Let us journey together.

Maybe I didn’t go anywhere.
Just wrapped around myself.
Constricted.

Sometimes my anger is a burning light.

A terrible, powerful force.
The oceans which feed it
are immense.

My rage gives way to Longing
Unseparated, we are free.

I never found a way to perfectly express
with the whole of my being
that one great Beauty I see everywhere

I am always falling.

And falling, praying.

Don’t forget me, don’t stop calling.

Nobody wants to be other than Love.
To be less than their purest self.
To be this not that.
Unfullfilled.

Sometimes my grief is unconsolable.

This is a poem for Him.
_________________

A warrior turns to face his anger
He says “Come, come and dance”
Dance until we weep
Then grow your softness

He is not afraid
To be invincible
He moves like water.

There is space for everything inside him.
So he laughs and plays.

You have made great effort to be Master of your ship
I bow to your intention
Here, take the lamp which burns inside my heart
It can be lonely at sea.

Raise the humble flag of a warriors love
It can not be torn.
Cutting through illusion
Storms make way for freedom
Ride your winds
Sail free, untethered
to light a Way

Blessings on your course

Such skill takes time and practice
I am adrift

Full of cracks
The cracks of hesitation, self doubt and indecision
My bamboo is not strong enough.

My snake is all twisted up in knots.
Dearanged by lack of freedom

The depth and intensity of my rage
The raw force, unexpressed
If I could harness it, direct it with care,
Would equal yours. I know.

It is a force for healing.

You showed me where there is no place for fear
No place to hide
Stand up now and be seen
Before the face of death
“All of this is Love”

I had to break to fit that kind of love inside me.

If it were not for this exterior life,
and I dived down into the depths of me
and you into the depths of you

The demons and deities I could produce
From my own ancient energies
Would dance with yours well.
We could make a fine show together.

Of fire and wrath
and Love
of wisdom that cuts like a blazing knife

There are no prisoners here.

Then sit down laughing
side by side
Drink from the tea kettle
as old Friends.

Knowing we are nothing
Humility and compassion
We suffered long to learn
So now,
Light like air

With the taste of tears still on our lips
We know what sweetness is

Sweetness is owning our own Hell
and making Heavens garden there
where fruit and flowers grow,
where children sing

Sweetness is
offering your rage
on bended knees
Saying I Love you

When the clouds of this and that
Drift away
Birds on the wind
Flow like water

Everything returns to silence.

Let us make love one day
Unbound
Melt together in pools of warmth
Beneath the stars
of a million births and deaths

When I am finally naked
of all that is not
When you can move through me
Freely
Let my offer myself to you

Raise me up, raise you up.

Being not of this world
yet in it
I recognised a companion

Oh fool I
Showed myself to be less than worthy
That we do not walk together
That I stand not by your side.

Dive into your Ocean, Friend
Find me there,
meet me there,
Love me there.

Lose me here
in the Light of your loving.

I am deep enough to hold you.

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Dream

I dream of running free
wild beneath an open sky
Wind in hair
rain on skin
Of light
lying flesh to earth
beneath trees
of grass and leaves

I dream of being alive
to fill life completely
Of spirit unleashed
to move and breathe
Of being love
unworded
unbound

I dream of a spring
crystal waters
flowing from the core
of my beginning
and see how i have polluted it
such beauty,
all the light distorted

I pray that the great Love
will take me, not let me go.
Make me strong enough
to honour the crystal waters
Flow free
Blessing reality
Uncorrupted, awake
Light on Light.

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A song unsung.

This love is not a lie.

There is a sadness, which is not anger.
There is a pain, which is not selfishness.
There is a not knowing, which tries to see.
There is a bewilderment which tries but fails to understand.
There is a sustained effort so clumsily manifested.
There is a truth which can’t be heard, a song unsung.
There is a forgiveness which says “here let me take your pain, let me suffer it myself and turn it into your healing”
There is heart broken and broken and broken. It wants nothing for itself.
There is a compassion for all beings. It weeps and it weeps and it weeps and it weeps.

There is a person all gone wrong.
It doesn’t know where to turn.
It is doesn’t fear being seen.
But it weeps and it weeps and it weeps.

It prays “Break me open, make me softer, don’t let me resist. Let me hear you more deeply, let me reveal my self more clearly. Let me take right action. Let me love you more purely. Here is the jewel of my integrity. It is all I have. I offer it fully. Polish it, polish it, please reveal my courage.”

Forgive my mistakes. Were I perfection, I would only serve you in this world. I would give you more. Beyond this dream which I have executed so badly is another place… I never found a more beautiful place to dance than the place where the only dancing is the one in which everyone is wordlessly joined. We are the dance. If time was mine to give, I would give it all to you. But there is no mine. Time has no meaning, only that which takes place within. The only measure of every moment is how fully could you love what you saw.  All I can do is look, but I can not see. Remove the veil from love. I am the veil. There is only a space inside which a mystery is happening. Who are you, who am I? I don’t know.

When you speak, i hold a silent prayer, “Let me hear and accept these words clearly, without judgement or assumption or defence. Let the message travel direct to a place of understanding. Give me the humility, the openness, to hear. Remove me, remove me please, that truth may be known and acted upon.”

I believe there is a harmony, from where we all came to which we all belong. Any discord comes from the unreal. Really we are all in deep agreement. It is this deep agreement that I seek to uncover and from where I wish to live. It is where the real conversation takes place. It is already here. I weep because outside of that agreement is a desolate land where words are blown like dust and do not reach the heart. How can we meet within the real? How can I remove your suffering?

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Hide and Seek

You’ve fallen in Love with falling
in Love with me
again – Don’t do that!

Stay here,
where I can feel you,
with me – Always.

The sweetness of remembering
the slightest reflection
of my Embrace
is Nothing when compared to
the falling outside
of your Self in the infinite
Union

Fall in Love, if falling
in Love pleases you –
but know you can not Know me
Intimately until you give up spinning
so endlessly
in this game of hide and
Seek

There is a Space – you hold
the ancient Key
use it to come all the way home
Then throw it away!

Some Being will take it
to wear about their neck –
and fall in Love
Whilst we sing to them,
calling their Soul
in the great Silence we All
Belong to.

~

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Be Unspeakable

This great love that comes upon you,
that wraps you, envelops you,
melts you so tenderly
in the indescribable embrace;
That breaks you open with a soft “Oh!”
of surprised loving;
That enters you utterly
with the most exquisite gentleness
you have ever perceived;

It is not yours –
neither of your own doing,
nor of your own effort:

It is a gift from beyond,
it is grace flowing –
it is the support of light itself.

Don’t take it for granted!

There’s a tiny voice, far too loud:
“I have been searching everywhere
whilst you were here always,

I will take you when I am ready –
You are all that I long for – please stay
whilst I step aside
to continue my dream
for just a little longer:

Your touch is – unspeakably divine
but you want me far too much,
or is it I who is wanting?

Either way, I will drown myself in you,
but  first, let me forget again –
so I may behave like one who has not
been kissed by the source of G-d –
for just another day, or week,
or perhaps a life or two:

I’m not yet ready to exchange
my freedom
for the infinity of unbound loving,
My shadows still need
a little space, to play.”

Don’t listen!

When this Love comes
drop everything
and say “yes, yes, YES!”

You must be ready
to throw yourself in completely –
to give up every thing you have
in an unstoppable flow of gratitude;
Be unspeakable –
really you have nothing to give,
all you can offer is so incredibly modest
in the ultimate face of this – Love.

It is the greatest mystery
why any being,
any small, lost, suffering being
(which is all that we are)
would reject the beloved;
Would reject truth, and life itself,
for a few more stolen moments
destructively engaged with the senses.

Oh, we hurt ourselves so
much, whilst G-d weeps.

Don’t take love for granted!
When grace comes,
the time is right –
the time is now.
Let it set your heart on fire
and don’t turn back.

When you recognise how small you are
as you try to ignore G-d –
When you see how long, how patiently
your own Soul has been waiting;
When you realise how relentlessly
this love has been poured upon you –
and know how much
you have been forgiven,
You will weep oceans of tears.

Bow down to this light, this love,
this absolute tenderness – in which
you have been so completely permeated –
accept the Soul’s embrace;
From this moment,
surrender to the infinite holding,
in every breath of spirit
be moved by Grace.

Whisper into the fullness,
“Here is my heart:
Take it,  Enter,
Now”

~

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Presence of Light

We all have Wounds
and we try to conceal them from Light;
We bandage them tightly
and say “Don’t touch me there!
Don’t even look –
It will hurt
too
much”

You can spend a whole life time
in fear
of being tender.
Don’t be afraid
of becoming undone.

The truth,
when perfectly revealed,
will release you fully
to heal
the deepest
source
of Longing.

What do you long for?

If you stop to listen
for even one moment,
You will feel
the Presence of Light
against every atom
of Being.

We can find a thousand reasons
to resist the Soul’s embrace

Secretly we know
that

Only this Love –
relentlessly seeking our softness;
flowing toward us
in wave after Luminous wave –
can dissolve all the Pain
we mistakenly held on to
in this long
lonely Dream.

We hide behind walls of grief
for we know
we will be lost
in the infinite of Loving
when we surrender
the need
to be separate.

It’s time to let go of our shadows;

The purest freedom comes
from allowing
Love

Don’t run away,
be opened by the sweetness;
abandon the self completely
to your burning Heart:

G-d
has been waiting there,
since the first spark of Life,
to immerse your whole Being
so tenderly
in Light

~

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Speak of Your Love

When I don’t feel you near me,
When you are not on fire
in the silence of my heart,

I feel
so lost.

I can’t even say one word
if it is not to speak of your Love.

(Or the longing for that)

I am here!
Please, open me,
Hold me, breathe me –
Don’t let go.

There is nowhere to be
without you.

But wait!

How many times must I forget?
Now I remember
how to announce my presence:

Stop right here
in the space of being;
Be perfectly still.

Listen from the centre:

Ah! I hear you
Everywhere.

You have been
so terribly patient

Everything is alive with your light.

~

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Be Perfectly Ashamed

The rain
that comes at dawn
is beautiful;
Don’t hold back
Run out beneath the open sky
and dance, dance!

Let your heart loose
Be wild and free.
Listen to the birds sing.
See their feathered breasts
tremble. So completely
they are giving.

You too can be naked
of every thing
that keeps you from
Being.

Stay awake all night if you
must. Let the longing pierce
you. Don’t run away, turn
to face it. Break open.

Feel the ecstasy rising.

The Friend said these troubles
were never intended
as ropes
that tie you to the world,
But as a ladder
that connects you
directly
to the purest source
of Love.

This is your truth,
that intimate connection.

Meet the darkness tenderly,
lose all hope;
Be perfectly ashamed. This
is when he Loves you most.
Let the Beloved touch you,
don’t hold back.

There is a deeper light;
It is coming, now.

~

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Sweetest Tears

Deep within your Heart
is a great well of tears
Some of them are fresh
Others as ancient as time

Don’t be afraid to enter
Dive to the untouched depths
There are many treasures waiting
In the darkness there:

The sweetest tears –
The wild, raw, untamable ones
The streaming torrents of grief –
Are really made of purest light

Find that sacred source
from which all tears spring
and channel your deepest sorrows
into an irresistible fount of Loving

If the Beloved himself
were to weep, freely
Every drop of his brilliant tears
would Love a whole universe into being.

~

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Fall in Deeply

Fall into your sadness, dear –
don’t hold back
I want you to know
It has an infinite capacity for loving.

There are a thousand reasons to be sad.
If they are yours, embrace them.
G-d never asked his children to be happy
always. You can love whilst weeping.

Here is the secret:
You don’t have to be perfect to love
perfectly. A broken heart is full of light
Sadness keeps the great fire burning.

Don’t be ashamed. Fall in deeply.
The great Loving that you are
wants to spill out quite brilliantly.
G-d will kiss you so sweetly if you let it.

~

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Only Reflections

When I was a child,
feeling the goodness
in me,
in you,
in all things,
I looked to you to confirm it

I poured all my love
into people who were
Incredibly lost. People
who never felt deeply
all hearts share a truth.

People hurt others
when they are hurting
They don’t understand
who they are.
People make boxes
then sit in them,
shouting loudly.

They are really afraid
of light. And sometimes
do terrible things.

You taught me
to be ashamed.
You said goodness
is something out there
something that we are not.
This is what you had learnt.
You said you know
that Love is a lie.

You confused me so much.
It’s okay. I accept you.
There is nothing to forgive
Everyone is doing their best

You made me look
at being a person.
Thank you. It broke me
again and again.
But something is still here.

When we get broken
it makes an opening, for light.
I understand now
how terribly lonely you must be.

It’s time to change direction
and pour all our love into truth,
I will not be ashamed
if it doesn’t come back.

There is no return of light –
only reflections.

When I give my love to truth
it’s flowing in to you, too.
You are truth.
You don’t need to know about it

One day, we will all be free.

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Fall into Your Love

Is there something wrong
with the truth of a child –
that we must teach her
how to be human? If she is wise
she will spend the rest of her life
trying to forget.
She will want to be G-d.

The purity I know,
the place where we come from,
does not go away. It’s here.
But i’m sometimes afraid to look
into the eyes of a child,
lest she should see doubt in me –
all the horror written there;

Lest she be infected with shame,
with the thoughts that come after
life happens. When we forget G-d.
Oh we become so disturbed.
Don’t change little one, keep your truth;
Fall into your love. Be as you are.

~

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Closer, Deeper, Lighter (a song)

If you lose your way
don’t be afraid
For the love in you
will keep you safe…

I know it’s hard
to see sometimes
But the light in you
will be your guide…
_
and i’m coming closer and closer and closer to you…x4
_
If it seems too dark
just close your eyes
for the light that’s real
is deep inside…
_
So still your heart
and quiet your mind
The love that’s true
you’re sure to find…
_
and i’m listening deeper and deeper and deeper to you…x4
_
Your tears are prayers
they open space
For deeper truth
and higher grace…

Be sweet your sorrow
soft your pain
Be open heart
and pure your name…
_
and i’m being lighter and lighter and lighter in you.. x4
_

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Keep Me Foolish

Some people mock
those who pray;
They say “Only a fool
will call upon the name of G-d”

We are all children
don’t deny our innocence
Light can not be stolen

I don’t want to grow in the shadows.
So I turn to Love and say
“Keep me foolish. Please”

I can’t be brave.
You know that –
you made me this way.
It should really be you
on your knees,
begging forgiveness
for all the grief that caused.

I want you to make
the whole of me a prayer
So there isn’t a beginning
or an ending; a coming
or a going.
Not even one moment
that I leave your lips.

When people say G-d isn’t
I go deeper inside
I’ve been standing here naked
watching and listening
For all of time
and I never saw a place –
not even the smallest space
– that was empty.

Some people passing by
with their bundles of knowledge
Try to tell me
everything that IS isn’t:
that everything is not you.
I don’t want to be buried
beneath the weight of all that knowing

So I just smile
and say “Yes, Yes yes”
It doesn’t really matter –
after all, no one is listening
I never saw anyone
who is not G-d

One way or the other
we all play at being ignorant
It was made like that
So play how you will
– and be happy

But let me stay here
on your lips
I’ll do all the weeping
and the laughing
Blessing all the shadows
until the light comes home.

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